Nightmares

Ive never been as scared as I was last night.

I remember just sitting in the bathroom on the floor with that gun to my head. I left the water running inside so that no one could hear me, but I feel like my heart was beating so fast it could be heard outside the door. Yes, I know thats not possible okay? But go with it.

The gun, or an evoker as Mitsuru-senpai calls it... it felt so cold. The whole time I was crying and I couldnt stop. I wanted to be able to do what my senpai did and summon my persona. I just couldnt pull that trigger, though, and no amount of reassuring could help me stop shaking.

In the end all I did was drop the evoker. That was all I could do because it seemed like I lost the feeling in my hands. I still... kept crying, too! And I look really bad when I cry! Its terrible.

-sigh- Whatever the case, I heard the door opening downstairs so I ran down as soon as I felt I looked somewhat like I hadnt just cried my eyes out over something that shouldnt be so hard. >< When I got down to the lounge of the SEES dorm, I saw the two people about my age that Id never seen before in my life. Who were they and how on earth did they get in?

Turns out they were newcomers to the dorm, just joining... really, really late. Lol, I felt kinda stupid, too, I mean... That poor boy. I pulled the evoker out right in front of him and he looked so freaked out that I could swear he thought I was about to shoot him. Even when Mitsuru-senpai said it wasnt a real gun, he didnt look like he believed her. Neither did the girl beside him, and I could see why. Senpai doesnt seem like the best liar. Then again, neither am I.

...I kinda hope they can just... forget that ever happened and we could start over? God knows I need friends whose first impression of me is as 'the girl who tried to shoot you with a gun.'

I guess it just goes to show that even being popular doesnt mean you always make the best impression. ...Stupid Yukari.

Anyway, until next time, right?

♥ Yukari